Friday, September 17, 2010

"Exercise Freaks Are Putting Stress on the Healthcare System"

Get this! Someone finally figured out why healthcare is expensive! And the answer is:


If you go to the gym a lot, or you put in a lot of mileage running or on your bike, if you do a lot of yoga or Crossfit or rock climbing - YOU are the reason the healthcare system is stressed. Not obesity causing diabetes and heart disease. Not smoking, not drinking too much. It's people who exercise. Problem solved!

It's funny that the guy who's making this claim is the eminently healthy, not at all overweight Rush Limbaugh. By "not at all overweight" I mean "a fatty-fatty-boombalatty with enough cholesterol in his left pinky to plug a feral swine's aorta, plus he's always getting caught with heavy-duty pain killers, and how many wives have you had by now?". As you can see in med school, students learn to be sensitive to the needs of overweight patients like the big fat disgusting about-to-collapse-under-his-own-gravity-into-a-black-hole-of-adipose-and-sweaty-yeasty-stomach-wrinkles Rush Limbaugh, that is, if he doesn't have a HUGE heart attack or die from diabetes first from being a big fat porker. Thus stressing the healthcare system.

[Added later: the brilliant advice continues. "Eat all the twinkies you want!" You'll "sweat it out"! (Note: zero medical evidence for "sweating things out"; note the rejection even of his personal physician's advice here.]

Below: Rush Limbaugh.


TomC said...

Rush is right. As always. Such a visionary.

Your posting was very funny.

Michael Caton said...

I'm glad you enjoyed it, although I must confess some anxiety after having spoken out against House Harkonen.