I'd never actually been to the mission there. The decoration in old California missions is really interesting (for my money the best one is San Miguel on the Central Coast.) We went because that's where Juana Maria, the inspiration for Island of the Blue Dolphins is buried. It was a Sunday so there was a mass going on.
The beach was nice as always (Hendry's this time), especially because apparently Barbie had parked there. Always good catching up with friends, one of whom is an expert on nonconsensual feline encounters.
I also bought an ostrich egg (sitting in coffee mug for scale) at an ostrich farm in the area, which I'm not naming because they charged me $50 (you can get them under $30 if you look around San Diego.) We ate at M and G's house later (thanks for making it.) The amount of egg you see in the bowl was what still remained after 7 omelettes had already been made.
2. DISNEYLAND
You know what Disneyland looks like - scroll to the end for observations if you care. Much like distance running, what made it tolerable was pacing, mentally subdividing it into small pieces, and alcohol. Below you can see the Matterhorn ride looming above Disneyland, much like a Mayan temple jutting through the jungle canopy.
Above and below: many a dazzling nighttime celebration is to be had. I'm amazed that Disney is open so late.
Above: I admit I kind of liked the effect at the aptly-named Blue Bayou, which looks out over the start of the Pirates of the Caribbean ride. Below: this reminds me of a quote by Kral Mrax, "Dyslexics of the world, untie!" If that jkoe offends you in any way, my sincerest alopogies.
Above: moonlight over one of the attractions (illumination is artificial. This is less Umberto Eco's hyperreality, and more the uncanny valley of nature scenes.) Below: I actually did unironically enjoy the light show, where video is projected into misty water; here you can see la Casita from Encanto.
Below, you can see three statues that are found in Mile Square Regional Park (I went there to visit the most literally-named park I've ever been in and it did not disappoint): thirteenth century Vietnamese general Tran Hung Dao, twentieth century American president Ronald Reagan, and twenty-first century philanthropist and playboy Anthony Stark. In all seriousness, Fountain Valley is loaded with great Vietnamese food, and driving through the area I pulled in no fewer than three Vietnamese AM stations.
3. SAN DIEGO
First, the required visit to Torrey Pines to hike down to the beach.
I hadn't been to Iron Mountain for years and since I just got some good beach runs in when I was in SD back in December, decided I wanted some more deserty experience. Ironically a rain storm was about to roll in, consistent with Socal's wet winter this year, which may explain why the ceanothus had erupted like I'd never seen it.
4. VASQUEZ ROCKS
A unique rock formation within the TMZ, it's used all the time in television and movies, most famously as the site of the Kirk vs. Gorn fight in Star Trek (though let's not forget the temporary deaths of Bill and Ted.) It's only about 15 minutes from the 5, near the top of the San Fernando Valley, and has a lot of little trails and areas that are fun for kids.
5. HOME
With the clouds over the hills, Sonoma County was doing its best impression of upland Maui.
ADDENDUM - NOTES ON DISNEYLAND
You need to actually study and learn how the various passes work before you go, so do a real web search, don't just read this. It's not just walk up and buy a ticket like when I was a kid, which I'm sure is some microcosm of the complexity of modern life. Also, prior to this visit I hadn't been there for 20 years so if you've been there more recently, you'll be surprised by the things that surprised me.
People were nice, unfailingly so. Not just the staff, but the other guests. I was expecting a nightmare full of Karens and chest-bumping MAGAs from red states afraid of catching teg ghey from Californians, but everyone was super friendly and patient. So much for the death of American civility!
That said, there was a higher proportion of Californians than I expected. I thought there would at least be more people from other states but of the people I talked to it was about one in ten. Lots of special deals to get locals in the park - like airlines, they will come down in price to keep "seats full". Very few foreign visitors.
Food is mediocre. Duh. But they have alcohol in parts of the park now. This was new to me.
Newer rides with an element of immersion have clearly designed their waiting areas to be part of the experience (Star Wars Wmigglers Run, Guardians of the Galaxy.) At first I was mad about being tricked. But then I realized this is not like automation allowing specialist work to be devolved back to the originator (eg expense reports 25 years ago vs now), it's just being more entertained while you're waiting in line.
I'm old and joyless so it's hard to not just see the underlying ride mechanic and ignore the theme as mere decoration even when the experiences are "immersive" (yes if it were metal, science fiction or psychiatry I would feel the same.) So if your soul has not died a slow and lonely death from neglect, take that into account.
The backdrop in Mickey's Toontown was neat. If you're used to California hills the illusion works pretty well.
No matter how big an amusement park is, it feels limited. You constantly come around a corner and realize you've been there already. This may be wh inevitably I did start to get my "trapped" feeling, similar to what you might feel if you're stuck in a hotel right around Newark Airport for more than 24h (see end of this post.) In my case it was seeing the kids react to everything. Which is why, no offense, I cannot begin to fathom why adults without children would ever go near it. The park is clearly aimed at younger kids so they don't need the Shityourpanzer world's highest fastest etc. coaster to get people there, and there is also not the mid-adolescent trouble-making vibe you often run into at amusement parks (partly also due to the cost I'm sure.)
For this reason, I wish there were more costumed cast members wandering around the park. That's what makes it different from other amusement parks and that's why the little kids are there. Can this really be a significant cost? I can imagine there are many kids whose families only go for one day with their heart set on seeing eg Black Panther or Belle, and have to go home without because they weren't working that day.
Rides on the Disneyland side break an amazing amount (not so much at California Adventure.) Of the ones we wanted to go on, at one point three broke in one day. You get lightning pass or Genie or whatever it's called for everything if that happens and you waited in line a long time, or you already had lightning pass, which makes it not so bad.
The kid thought New York was overwhelming – first, the walking, and second, the crowds. Times Square the day after the Hamas attack was predictably loud and chaotic.
But even for a suburban kid, NYC has plus sides. Like NYC pizza! And Hamlet, the Algonquin Hotel cat (below, credit Daily Mail)!
And the Natural History Museum! I have to say that the California Academy of Science still beats it. I’m typically suspicious of virtual exhibitions with computer graphics (can’t I see this at home?) but they took advantage of the immersiveness allowed by the use of projectors – walls and floor are all part of the imagery.
The next day, the Statue of Liberty was a big hit, but not as much as the Ice Cream Museum. (Don’t take the edible slime on the flight home with you, it sets off the chemical detectors at security.) Later that day I got my Scotch egg at Fraunces Tavern, where Washington gave his farewell address to his officers at the end of the Revolutionary War (interior shot credit Tripadvisor.)
After that, I finally did my run across the Brooklyn Bridge, then back across the Manhattan Bridge, up the East Side past Chinatown and Bellevue to the U.N. Notes: somehow I was surprised at the crowd on the Brooklyn Bridge; I realized my default assumption is that the places I want to see are obscure. The Manhattan Bridge is LOUD when the train goes through to the point where, if I lived there, I would bring earplugs or avoid the bridge. In Chinatown I overheard an earnest young man tell his friends in a crowd "Bro I just matched with that girl on Hinge!" I used a public restroom at Lion's Gate Field which was mumblingly reviewed by the homeless man who entered ahead of me as "motherfucking filthy." Unsurprisingly, less than 2 days after the Hamas War began, there were big protests next to the U.N. Notes:
Above, evidence that there really is a neighborhood in New York called Dumbo. Below, now going across the Manhattan Bridge. Between the Brooklyn and Manhattan Bridges is Main Street Park, which has an actual beach - would not have expected that.
Above, Brooklyn across the East River. You can't keep going north past the Platform (because of U.N. security issues?). Below, the U.N., and also, due to my extreme metalness, after some light editing, my metal pose is indistinguishable from the album cover. One block in there were opposing Israel-Hamas rallies.
Differences in NYC from five years ago: SO MUCH WEED in Manhattan. On the West Side I smelled weed on most blocks. Not an improvement. Also saw blatant grab-and-runs twice from the same 7-Eleven in two days. Also we had to make reservations for the Museum of Natural History. Like wine-tasting in NorCal, museum-going in New York has gotten less fun and spontaneous.
Also (not specific to NYC) the kid has only ever seen non-streaming television in hotels and refers to it as "channel TV." (As used in the sentence, "Channel TV is stupid" when we couldn't rewind something.)
I looked for 7 different Toynbee tiles and none were still there, although I'm pretty sure that I could see where one had been pressed in then pried off; here ends my quest of trying to find one.
Also note: Google lists Penn Station as being at 34th Street and 10th Avenue. It is not, and there is apparently no way to submit a correction to Google Maps.
During the last day we visited Rockefeller Center (just being set up for skating) and of course FAO Schwartz, some of whose toys I couldn't figure out how they worked. It's like living in the not-too-distant future! I should note that during our time in New York, on two occasions, a German-speaking child approached the kid at the top of something (a sliding board in Battery Park, a rock in Central Park.) This is consistent with the wife’s racist theory of hiking and climbing, that people of Germanic descent are a mountain and forest people who instinctively seek out high places and often find their countrymen there. In North Jersey we enjoyed the Rainforest Café (if you have kids, go). Things we missed: in NYC, One World, and getting a drink at Stonewall. In North Jersey: I STILL have not ever been to Princeton. And, hopefully the Holmdel Antenna will be preserved, so I don't have to be in a rush to get to it. This was the microwave antenna where the cosmic microwave background (the echo of the Big Bang) was discovered. Having recently been in the New York Times among other publications of note, now hopefully it is receiving more attention.
PENNSYLVANIA
On the way to PA, I finally got to Washington Crossing (why isn't this visited more often as a historical site?) and New Hope, which I'd somehow escaped. Northern Bucks County is really pretty, especially in the fall, as is all of Pennsylvania. I actually felt a little homesick flying back this time.
Above, Washington Crossing, credit kids.outdoors.org, and below New Hope, which when you look up "cute little town" in the dictionary, this is the picture they use, credit Grace Paradise on flickr.
And once we got to old Berks Cauwndy, we ate. We ate Lebanon bologna, and ring bologna, and drank cream soda, and ate
lebanon bologna, and shoo-fly pie (from Black Buggy Baking Company in Oley - get the moist kind) and finally, the cheese wheel at Mangia! Cheese wheel. Cheese wheel.
Above, Black Buggy Baking Company, below a shoo-fly pie whose charms were such that I couldn't stop to get a photo before I dug in. Below that, the Doghouse hot dog restaurant (note the Berks County dog, though we were just there for cho-chos.)
We finally got to the Deitsch Eck, an awesome PA Dutch restaurant in the metropolis of Lenhartsville, along with Motoo the Egyptian (who also made an appearance here). Highly recommended. The staff are warm, friendly and funny (decidedly un-PA Dutch actually but we'll let it slide.) Among many other things, we had scrapple (duh), apple butter, and yet more shoo fly pie for dessert (which I haven't been able to find anywhere in NorCal, nor could I make a passable one myself.) Normally I don't like scrapple (this is why they made me move to California) but this was tasty.
Chakey!
Ah, earthy humor
And this is where I must disclose my shame as a parent, that the kid somehow escaped Berks County without eating sauerkraut, scrapple, funnel cake, or even shoo fly pie. I am being called to the PA Dutch High Council to answer for this omission.
I was grateful to get over to Blue Marsh one morning for a beautiful autumn run, straight out of a painting. Criminally underrated, most of all by me when I still lived in the area! I've done my best to make up for it in previous visits.
I also, without meaning to, drove through Stonersville. That town is not capitalizing on their name at all, similarly to Cool, California. (Image credit Reading Eagle.)
Other exciting events: my high school was kind enough to let me corrupt the minds of innocent students in exchange for having a good old high school lunch. (In all seriousness, I was honored the school would have me, thanks to the faculty and students who gave me their time and attention.) It was actually really surreal being back there, since I hadn't been back for over 30 years. You know those dreams where you can't find the exam room and you're panicking? Every time I'd been in those hallways for the last thirty years (or my mind believed I was) I was panicking, so maybe that's why I was uneasy. It's also a bit disconcerting how much I've forgotten. Did I ever know we had two gyms? I couldn't even remember where the library originally was.
Yet MORE excitement: finding a leopard frog in a creek at Nolde Forest (the second most underrated trails in Berks County), and driving across Bitzer Bridge (below, image credit Thoughtco and WabbyTwaxx on flickr.) As with so many things, until now I never noticed how beautiful leopard frogs were.
HERSHEY
Hersheypark was a blast. I hadn't been there since 1995 and I forgot that this New Pennsylvania keeps up with the times. That place has grown! There are what, 6 roller coasters? In truth I was kind of glad the kid was with me so I had an excuse not to go on the newer scarier ones. We spent most of our time on kiddy rides but I did get the kid on the Comet, and she was admirably brave though obviously a bit scared when we got to the front of the line. In the end she loved it. She's now the third generation who has ridden this roller coaster, the tamest in the park, though I often joke that it's scary because you wonder if the time you ride it will be when it will finally fall apart. The park used to close in September I think but some marketing person realized they were missing an obvious opportunity with Halloween, a holiday celebrated by giving children candy, and there was a trick-or-treat thing going one where the water park rides were closed but they had a path set to go through and get handed chocolate. Obviously popular! THe professional-grade s'mores were also a big hit. The wife commented that the doctors trained at the med school next door must have excellent education in diabetes management. (I know many doctors who did train there and one is in fact an endocrinologist, famed among other things for his ice-cream scooping ability.)
On the way up to State College there was an ill-advised stop at Gettysburg, which it turns out young children give exactly zero shits about. (And I missed a chance for a bonfire in the backyard of none other than the creator of celebrated tabletop game Maze of Minos!) Having missed this, I consoled myself with a visit to the Red Rabbit.
Make it a habit
Finally we were in State College. As ever, the evening began at the Gentlemen's Club, where we were discussing Wittgenstein over a game of backgammon.
An elevator of historical importance
I'm not sure why I took the above picture, or of many other things I apparently did that night. I do appreciate the gift of underwear from my dear friend Matthew. I will cherish it always.
>
Above, this sorry fellow was on the grass just outside the hotel. One of those random images of sadness and beauty that can sneak up on you anywhere.
We then repaired to Beaver Stadium, to view the annual sacrifice of a bad football team at homecoming. (The team was UMass and the final score was 63-0, largely owing to a standout performance by Hingle McCringleberry. The same could not be said for the Ohio State game the following week.) I prefer tailgating to the actual game, and my complaints about going to big metal shows are ten-fold going to a football game. I very much felt the attitude of "it's your privilege to be here, so you'll endure whatever discomforts you must" which is hard to find in any other product except maybe Apple. And endure we did. Walking miles around the stadium in rain, wind, cold, and muddy fields for tailgating is especially fun if you have California footwear. The company made it worthwhile but I'm sad to say now that the whole family has seen a Penn State game, it may be my last for a long time, if not ever. But if it has to be, I'm glad to have been with my crew. Long live Ground Zero!
BACK IN NORTH JERSEY
For reasons I won't go into, I ended up spending a day in the charming airport hotel area surrounding EWR. For obvious reasons, I spent a lot of time thinking about the inhumanness of these areas. They're unattractive (see below - picture of the area around the hotel), they're confusing to navigate, and there's nothing to do there - which leads to the feeling of being trapped, if you're without a car. There's actually an interesting neighborhood behind Spring Street (For example Algarves looks great - too bad the only way to get there is a half mile walk in the trashy strip along a busy highway with no sidewalk. Why does this happen? I can't think of any motivation for the hotels or airport to conspire to cause this (to get us to use the snack bar in our room?) There are lots of airport hellscapes but this one has to take the cake. Out of spite I documented it; it's like its own ecosystem or urban zone. Even here, the autumn sky was nice.
Solvitur ambulando! Note the thick brow-ridge and the death-grip on the beverage. You can email this handsome devil at mdcblogs@gmail.com. "[If you are depressed] go for a long walk...and if still depressed, then walk again." -Hippocrates ca. 410 BCE
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